I received two pieces of news that required me to take on responsible roles in both cases. It is the first one that I have to work more on. I'm asked to sing for a baptism service besides the two weddings I already have to sing for. For that service, I have to sing Schubert's Ave Maria as a solo. It is a heavy classical piece and I don't exactly have the best voice. I guess I'm approached only because my job's flexible enough to accommodate it.
Nonetheless (pause) I will try my very best to learn it and bring it out with my own flavour. I think trying to sound like others will only place pressure on myself and affect what I can produce. Every singer's diff but special in his (generic term) own way.
I am capable of it but scared and pessimistic. I must overcome this psychological barrier, especially on the day itself. The last time I heard someone sing Ave Maria solo, she was cool and confident though she was out of tune. I think it's worse to be conscious of the mistakes one makes while singing than to act as if they weren't there at all. People may think they were part of a different version of the song. Hehe.
I'm listening to the melody and printed out the lyrics. I try to sing it on my own and have even printed out the English translation so that in understanding what the lyrics mean, I can sing it better to the point of praying it. Of course, I've sought help from the organist accompanying me during the service too. We're going to practise it together, since it is in 2 weeks time.
Tiff was sweet enough to offer to sing it with me but I know I cannot depend on others to boost my courage and confidence. I must try to do it on my own. I'm not exactly a young girl. I know though that I must listen to the music and not just sing. I must sing in time to it. Wish me luck!
The second responsibility is to be part of a working committee for a church musical to be performed in public. The logistics team would be another name for it, I reckon. I'm not exactly very good in this area but I guess the tasks allocated to me will be catered to my capabilities. I am appreciative of being picked as one of the members since it indicates that I am responsible, capable and reliant in completing tasks assigned to me.
My initial reaction was one of dread but I told myself the above and I'm more fine with it now. Still, I can't let this get to my head, bordering on arrogance. At every moment, I must remember I'm God's instrument and my talents are from Him.
I've not sung for weddings for a very long time now since I started working. So now I'm going back to what I had left to others and moving on to new things like baptism services and singing a classical piece SOLO. I used to be more involved in choir before I went away for a while. Now it seems like I'm getting back to that same level. Oh well.
I can't control circumstances but I can control my reactions to them. I remember a friend telling me that it seemed new responsibilities had been given to me and my talents were enhanced many years back when the same thing happened to me. I guess this truth has surfaced again. Let's see how life turns out for me with time. It is interesting with these new projects but yet challenging.
No comments:
Post a Comment