Tests in preparation for competition

Something unexpected happened to me last night. I thought I would never cry again over a performance piece but I did. The tears just came and did not fully stop till some time before bedtime.

It is a piece that is my favourite and my best. I tried to focus more on the technique of singing and was grossly unaware that my volume had been terribly compromised.

I don't want to be the cause of obtaining a COP for it. At the same time, I think that this happened as an answer to a prayer. I need purification especially from my sense of pride and judgement. This was a strong form of humility from God, I guess. However, in the process of being refined into gold, God granted me angels to comfort me. Thanks Altos, Arthur and Nat!

It was not so good on the next night(Saturday night) too. I was still feeling small over my lack of timing as some members sang the pieces out of fun at a gathering. I didn't join them as I felt that I would have spoiled things. When I went home, this problem kept bugging me and I cried myself to sleep :S I really didn't want the next morning to come(Sunday)when there would be another test.

I woke up and after having relaxed my muscles, something I learnt on Friday, I decided to just sing out loud so I could be heard. I know that I know my music. I have to work on my confidence which is a major flaw, notwithstanding other musical flaws too. I did it with prayer and angels who prayed for me too. I succeeded. My choir conductor recognised my improved boldness and verbally acknowledged it. That and the applause of the choir were a huge encouragement. For the second song, he remarked that I was the only one in the quartet who did not lose my part :D He also said that he could hear me for the third song. Praise God and the Holy Spirit for having helped me and given me courage :)

I still need time to completely conquer my musical demons. My timing and rhythm is way off in comparison to others'. My weaknesses make me lose confidence in my ability.

Prayers before singing

I found myself being unable to project my voice and to mean what I sing for yesterday's warmup before Mass. It was, to me, a bad thing.

I said my usual Chorister's Prayers before Mass and without being initially aware of it, I discovered that I could do the above for Mass. These prayers have been used by God to reveal His power unto me and to once again instill in me the realization that I am singing merely on a borrowed voice. All glory goes back to Him!

SIngapore Idol 2009: can Singapore ever be devoid of racism?

When Sezali won the competition, some viewers were unhappy with it. They brought in the fact that he won because the Malay community voted overwhelmingly for him, but more disturbingly that the competition was a Malay-based one. This is due to the fact that he and the past two Idols are Malays. That is a rather unfair statement to make. It smacks of underlying racism. I am not a Malay, incidentally.

I was watching the finals and I feel that Sylvia sang the required Idol finale song in a dull and inexpressive manner. Touched by an Angel expresses the joy and awe at having received blessings and graces from God. Her rendition was devoid of such feelings. It was blatantly felt. She may have been a freethinker but that does not mean that she cannot attempt to imagine how it is for a non-atheist.

Singing a song with such a profound title requires the singer to understand the real meaning of the lyrics and bring out the emotions associated with it. This very reason made me feel that Sezali deserved to win the competition, because there was clear expression of such feelings in his rendition.

I concur with his comment that "Here we are all Singaporeans. There is no Chinese Idol or Malay Idol." His critics may still think that he may have been saying it to justify his win, but I think there is complete truth in it. It seems to me that they are just unhappy that Sylvia did not win instead. Anyway, the official statistics stated that she secured 39% of votes while Sezali secured 61% of votes. Enough said.

Art Fazil wrote his take on this issue. I like his ending sentence: " His victory was the triumph of talent over mass appeal." This is a very telling and irrefutable statement :D

Festival of Catholic Church choirs

I went for this event held at St Peter St Paul to celebrate the feast of St Cecilia, the patron saint of musicians and choristers. It was a humbling experience for me.

Some choirs shared their favourite songs with us and God used their voices to enter my heart. They really brought out the meaning of the lyrics and brought God out in the process. Blest Are They is a song that brought me close to tears. I have heard this hymn before but the chorus that begins with "Rejoice and be glad." had a different effect on me this time. Perhaps God used it to minister to my subconscious needs. The spirit they exuded while singing was inspiring and the sharing was not just a performance to them. They were humble in the midst of it.

I heard some new songs which were pleasantly melodious too. Worthy Is The Lamb(not the Hillsong) is one of them. The melody was simple and was an arrangement which I usually like.

We had sectionals on two pieces as a combined choir. It was such a wonderful experience. We got to know new fellow choristers. It was a great feeling being amongst choristers with different levels of singing and a great willingness to learn.
Some were first-time choristers and their enthusiasm as well as effort were heartwarming :) There were choristers as old as 60 and 75 years old!

When we combined with the other sections to sing the pieces, the gothic design of the church enriched our voices and we sounded really good. It was such a beautiful sound. I sat with some Filipino choristers from the newly-formed Divine Mercy choir and they were really nice people to be with. I hope to see them again in similar events in the future. :)

We learnt the Gregorian chants for Lord Have Mercy, Holy Holy and The Lord's Prayer. Surprisingly, the notations were easy to follow and the tunes were thus easy to get. As long as we have a musical instinct, and know how to sight-read, listen and memorise, this will be a much easier task :)

Our National Anthem

A big ruckus was made over Taufik's inaccurate rendition of our anthem. I feel that he got it only because he is famous. He was our first singing idol. That seems rather unfair, considering the fact that he did not do a greater wrong than Ris Low, and that he is but one of the many people who commit the same mistake when singing it.

It seems strange to note that the excuse given for not being able to get it right is that the people had sung it a long time back and had forgotten it as a result. I cannot fathom how they can forget such a poignant piece that has seeped into my mind, albeit unconsciously. I am proud to say that I can remember every single word of it and know that Majulah means Onward. Though I sang it for a national event as part of a choir, which means I had to rehearse it many times, I don't think it makes me that much of an exception in this aspect.

I disagree with some of the comments from the commoners on the streets but one really stands out. If this is a song about patriotism, then we should know the lyrics and it DOES matter when we do not. It is so sad how this 13-year-old student feels about our anthem.

Esplanade Concert Hall's VIP Box members of the audience

I attended a concert at Esplanade and bought a ticket for the VIP Box section of the Foyer Stall seats. This means that I was given a single seat which can be moved. It is not joined to the other 3 seats in my row.

I entered my section via a separate door which leads to another 2 doors. The usher asked if I was a friend of one of the performers. I guess few people go to this section. The ironic thing is that the real VIP was seated in the Stall section a few rows away from the stage.

The section was exclusive. Thus, when the other members of the audience and I exited it, people who were seated in the non-VIP Foyer Stall seats looked at us in curiosity. It felt nice to be regarded in this way :)

The most striking thing was that we were not elegantly or formally dressed. Perhaps that is why we had those looks. Lol. I realised then that being a VIP, whether real or otherwise, is not due to the clothes worn but to the cultured behaviour portrayed. I'm glad that I knew the correct moment to applaud after each performance by each choir. This makes me somewhat worthy of being in that section. :P Most people applauded after each song, but really, it should be done after all the songs by each choir. Of course, the real VIP was one because of his musical achievements in the history of Singapore's choral industry. Guess what, he wore simple attire.

The Call event

While doing my daily prayer, God affirmed us by speaking through the Gospel. The theme of our musical was the same as the theme of that day's Gospel: what profits a man if he gains the whole world but loses his soul.

It was a night of miracles. All came into place. Seats were filled up as the event began. Our makeup was done perfectly and in time. Almost all who were sick or lacked adequate sleep were sustained through the event. We were granted mercy to surpass in technicalities. My "taboo" was not revealed amidst the lighting and movements. My timing was present for the Indian dances and I had no backache as I usually had for the rehearsals. It really matters that my legs were in perfect condition to dance and move. I actually went down the steep stairs at the side of the stage without any help! I could also walk a long way to Aunty Joyce's car after the event. Praise God! Alleluia! The Malay dance was still not perfect though.

God truly revealed His marvels when some members of the audience were visibly touched. I feel so glad and honoured to be one of His instruments in this aspect. I've wondered whether the phenomenon would ever happen again, and indeed He showed me that it has never vanished.